For the past two and a half years, we have respited a little girl who I will refer to as "B". She was 12 when we met her (now 14). Over the summer, things at her placement weren't going too well. So she came to us for a visit. My husband and I had the opportunity to discuss the "what if" scenario if CYS asked us to take her full-time. He said he wasn't ready for a teenager. I agreed, but said, "But it's not just any teenager--it's B". Well, things worked out that she could return to where she was. The night of that decision, my husband and I took a walk. I told him that if things had turned out differently, I would have fought him for her. He said I wouldn't have had to fight him. That was reassuring.
Well, the day before we were supposed to get the six-year old boy, she was back. I thought for sure we'd get her this time. But they ended up sending her to a temporary place, until they could figure out a permanent solution for her. They didn't ask us if we'd be willing to take her. I didn't argue much, as we were busy preparing for the six year old. I later found out that it was because we had previously said "no" to a 10 year old, so they assumed we'd say "no" to a 14-year old. That's typically true, but again--not for B.
So this week I went to foster parent training, and talked to the placement coordinator. I told her of our willingness to accept her a month ago, and told her that if they'd consider us, we'd probably still be interested. She was optimistic that this would be a good placement. However, meanwhile B has been doing some work of her own, and has had a caseworker check out a friend's home that said they'd take her. When I went to visit B yesterday, she said that the home investigation had went well, and that she was going to be moving there. My heart sank. Well, it's definitely a POSSIBILITY for her to go there, but everyone else thinks it's best for her to come with us. She doesn't know, yet, that we're a potential placement as well. They're going to tell her that next week. If she adamently refuses to come here, we won't force her. But I hope that she will be willing to accept us as her family. I don't know if I can deal with another hearbreak (I mean, I know that I can--but I don't want to!).
Anyway, during our visit, she said she thinks of her current situation as "kind of like being away at college, and we're her parents coming to visit her." She also told me to tell my parents that she says hello and was predicting what kind of dog we'd get someday. So there's hope there. And she knows that we're on the list to get a little boy, which would make her a big sister (she loves that role). So maybe that will play in our favor. I just don't know what to think.
So we're back to waiting. I'll have to post the final result here next week, if we find out.
**As a side note, I got an opportunity to meet the six year old boy that we were slated to get in August this past week in school. He didn't know who I was. He was a little scruffy, but had a cute personality. I am completely okay with not having him at our house, though. God knows what He's doing!